April 25, 2007

Baptized Catholic, but raised atheist, she has spent the past few years blogging her way from atheist back into the Church

At the Vigil of the Resurrection, the Church confirmed her and received her into the Eucharistic Covenant. She has now written about her experience of her first Eucharistic Communion.

The biggest moment of the evening actually came right before I was about to receive the Eucharist. I was standing there, waiting for my husband to go up before me, and was hit like a ton of bricks with the profundity of the moment. "I cannot believe I'm standing here," I thought. How did I, a person who never even considered the possibility of God until my late 20's, who was a content atheist surrounded by worldly pleasures, who shrugged off most religions as irrelevant silliness and disdained Christianity, get here? I had a sort of "life flashing before my eyes" moment and began sobbing when I realized how close I came to not being here; how very easily I could be spending this night in a very different place, in a world without God.

And though I was mostly focused on myself when I actually received the Body and Blood of Christ for the first time, I did feel a noticeable difference afterwards. A few situations came up later that evening and the next day that would have normally resulted in snide comments and anger on my part, and I found it far easier than normal to be kind and charitable in situations where I'd normally fly off the handle.

Since then, every time I've received the Eucharist, I feel a subtle change. It's just a little easier to be kind, to be patient, to be selfless. Perhaps the change I feel is all in my head. I t's possible. And that's OK, because I don't receive Holy Communion because it's some sort of drug that will give me instantaneous results. I do it because I believe that God exists, that this is his Church, that this is what he wants me to do, and that I will receive his sanctifying grace -- whether I feel it immediately or not.
From her blog.
Click HERE for it.


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